Sunday, 3 July 2011


Beyond the Test

September/October 2009

Next, decide whether you're going to tell your family, friends, sexual partner(s), boss, etc. Of course, it's up to you to decide who to share this information with, but one thing to think about is that the only way stigma and discrimination can survive is by being perpetuated by the shame and secrecy of those it targets. It may seem inconceivably hard, but if you don't act ashamed, it will be harder for others to make you feel that way.

.....So what are you afraid of? Change? HIV-positive or not, you cannot live your life fully without it. And one of the most wonderful things I've learned from having my life full of people living with HIV/AIDS is not to waste time on the bullshit stuff, but to focus on what really matters. Just because you did turn out to be positive, your life isn't over, it's just different! And many of the differences can be growthful and beneficial for you if you let them. So when the last tear has been shed and you've uncurled and gotten out of bed, look this new life in the eye and, with the courage and curiosity of all great explorers, demand to know "What's next?"

Breathe deep and live long.


hay oo nga ito ang next step...  i will wait for 2 weeks, after the confirmatory tests results are out. i would have to talk to my diabetes doctor.  

para sa mga magulang ko? hmmmm matatagalan pa siguro, kelangan ko nga konkretong plano kung paano ko aalagaan at bubuhayin ang sarili ko bago ko masabi sa kanila ang katotohanan.  ayaw ko silang magworry, matatanda na sina mama at papa, baka lalo lang silang ma-stress. 

ito ang aking diary



  1. Hey Bong, Hope you are feeling a lot better. Took me about a year to accept, but you will be fine. Sipag lang dapat magpunta sa doctor. Ingat!

  2. everything has its time bong...
    tama reflect and plan... thats the perfect strategy...

    and dont forget your health. its very important. eat a balanced diet. dont smoke. dont drink alcohol. dont do drugs.

    but no one said you cannot love anymore or you are not allowed to be loved.


  3. natagal ko na rin gustong magpa hiv test pero wala akong lakas ng loob na gawin to. hindi ako takot na malaman na positive ako kahit pa hindi ako sexually active at isa lang ang partner ko (yun lang unprotected sex lagi). pero takot akong wala masabihan ng mga nararamdaman ko kung sakali mang positive ako.

  4. unknown. no one has to know if your not ready. in your own time, at your own phase, if your ready to take the test dun mo lang i-take...

  5. Unknown,

    salamat sa pagcomment, tulad ni migs andami kong delaying tactics, umabot din ng ilang buwan bago ako tuluyang nakapagpatest, and i finally did...

    ang payo ko lang sa yo, and this goes to everyone who have not taken the test... whether you guys have the virus or not already irrelevant as of this moment, wala na kayong magagawa, tapos na yun nakaraan, di na mababalikan, ang importante ngayon eh kailangan nyo ng malaman ang katotohanan, you will never know until you take the test,

    every week that will pass is a week of opportunity lost... opportunity to do something about it... opportunity to fight it... opportunity to medicate... they say that the philippines has one of the best HIV program in this part of the world but the key is early detection, time is very important... Let us not wait until it's too late.

    if you are afraid na wala kang mapagsabihan, bring someone with you... someone who can understand you, someone you can trust your life with. Magulang mo man yan, kapatid, kabarkada, kapartner... Lahat naman tayo meron nyan. All you have to do is ask them. Kung hindi ka parin kampante sa kanila and you would rather be with a stranger, then maybe some of us can help out, there are HIV counsellors who can help, all you have to do is ask.

    help is always available, all you have to do is take the first step.

    stay safe everyone.


  6. Green Xuanya,

    Yes im feeling much much better now, and YES i will make sure sisipagan ko ang magpunta sa duktor, i love my LIFE and i will do anything to keep it, with the help of everyone of course.



  7. niv and bong, thank you for those kind words. took some time off from work end of july so i can fully prepare myself for it. will take advantage of the time in between to reflect. will keep you posted.

  8. I admire you. Stay strong. :'(