Wednesday, 6 July 2011

SAGOT KAY JAKE.

jakejacobss said...

Too bad !!! No matter how safe you think having sex with someone else is, i think you're still imposing danger. If you cannot live without sex, then find someone who's already HIV positive. Where's your conscience? I don't have anything against people with HIV, but please do not let anyone else be infected with that virus!

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hello jake,

maraming salamat sa iyong komento. oo hindi ako mabubuhay ng walang sex, at mukhang yan din ang totoo sa halos lahat ng mga taong kilala ko, positive man sila o hindi. marahil ito'y integral na bahagi ng aking pagkatao. at naniniwala ako na karapatan kong mabuhay ng normal sa mundong ito.

nuong isang taon, ng unang beses kong mabasa ang blog ni eric (chronicles of e) ay nagsimula rin akong mabother ng kanyang sexual behavior. hindi naglaon, with proper education and my desire to know hiv  fully led me to understand that we should respect the rights of everyone, and the best thing to do is get tested and always BE SAFE.

to some degree, kunsensya ko ang nagtulak sa akin para magpatest, i cannot continue my life without knowing my hiv status.  ngayong alam ko na i am extra careful on what i do. mas maingat pa nga ako than most of the people i know.

mas nagwoworry ako sa mga taong hindi pa nagpapatest. hindi nila alam.


In the philippines, last 2009 - 835 filipinos tested positive to HIV, last 2010 - 1591 was tested positive and as of today (first 5 months of 2011) - 838 are already positive, and we are just in the first half of the year... do the math di pa ako kasama sa stats na yan.  naniniwala rin sila na ang tunay na figure might be 3x or even 4x more as a safe estimate.

if you dont want to contract the disease, abstain from sex and injecting drugs.  if you choose to engage in sex, then get tested and be responsible and safe.  a key factor in prevention of the spread of hiv is education.  educate yourself.

as for me, i know my status and i know my rights, i am determined to live my life to the fullest. i am very positive. hehe.

lastly, hindi dahil positive na ako ay positive na lang dapat ang makasex ko, although ngayon when i think of a life long partner parang gusto ko someone na positive na rin.  pero ang sabihin na dahil positive ako ay wag na akong makipagsex at sa positive na langdapat ako makipagsex, thats just plain prejudice and discrimination. kahit positive pa ang kasex ko, there is still risk of reinfection dahil may iba pang strain ang hiv.  safe sex is always the utmost importance.

nakapagpatest ka na ba jake?

ito ang aking diary

BONG

18 comments:

  1. ang sa akin lang, no matter how safe sex is for you, since may HIV ka na, sana man lang inisip mo muna ang kalagayan nung nakasex mo.. sinabi mo na karapatan mo ang makipagsex pero ang hindi mo alam eh binalewala mo din ang karapatan nung nakasex mo kasi hindi mo sinabi sa kanya na infected ka na ng virus, marahil kung sinabi mo yun sa kanya, nabigyan mo din sya ng option na pumili.. You people always say have safe sex..pero dahil may HIV ka na, you have to be extra careful. Kung makikipagsex ka man kung kanino, mas okay sana kung sasabihan mo sila na may AIDS ka. Bigay mo sa kanila yung karapatan nilang malaman yun dahil sa oras na mahawa mo sila, habmbuhay nilang dadalhin yun..

    Nagpatest na ba ako? hindi pa. And i dont think i have to dahil hindi naman tayo magkatulad ng lifestyle.. kaya kong mabuhay ng walang sex partner. Kaya hindi lahat ng bakla eh katulad mo na puro sex ang nasa isip.

    Ikaw na ang maysabi na kahit may HIV din ang makasex mo, posible pa din ang reinfection. Sana naisip mo din na kahit nakacondom ka pa or kahit sabihin mong safe sex yun, you still impose danger of infecting someone with that virus. Idagdag mo pa dyan ang hindi mo pagsasabi dun sa nakasex mo ng HIV status mo. Sa tingin mo ba, naging responsable ka sa ginawa mo?

    'yan ang hirap sa mga taong may HIV. Karamihan sa inyo eh nahawaan dahil sa hindi makuntento sa isang sex partner. Pero kung makapagsalita, para bang wala silang ginawang mali para mahawaan sila ng virus.

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  2. Hindi ako galit Bong pero aaminin ko na nakakainis.. If i were the guy you've had sex with, at tapos malalaman ko na may HIV ka and you know it but you opt not tell me, i would feel betrayed. Masasaktan ako.Magagalit..Do you think naging mabuti kang kaibigan sa ginawa mo?

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  3. i may sound intrimitida but again

    "hindi tayo pareho ng lifestyle"... why? close kayo?

    paano kung isa si bong sa 20 na needle prick mula noong jan-may2010
    paano kung isa sia sa 5 nasalinan ng HIV infected blood
    o siya yung may isang partner at ang partner nya ang nagbigay sa kanya ng sakit

    wala ka namang alam sa kanya. this is his blog. but you dont know him..

    "Nagpatest na ba ako? hindi pa. And i dont think i have to dahil hindi naman tayo magkatulad ng lifestyle.. kaya kong mabuhay ng walang sex partner. Kaya hindi lahat ng bakla eh katulad mo na puro sex ang nasa isip. "
    --- so you mean you never explored? ever in your life? never ka nagengage even oral sex without condoms? if yes. ikaw na si perfecta malinis walang bahid dungis.

    if no. we call that plainly IGNORANCE. its our right to give our opinions. but we should be responsible in giving them. we need to know facts, remove our biases, and we should be evidenced based.

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  4. jake, kailanman ay hindi ko sinasabi na hindi ako nagkamali, hindi ko ipinagmamalaki ang aking kalagayan at never kong iaadvoctae na gayahin ninyo ako.  kaya nga ako nagsimula ng aking blog ay para maging malaking aral ito sa lahat ng makakabasa, dito sa blog na ito ay iisaisahin ko ang aking mga kakulangan at pagkakamali.  wala pa ako dun, there will be a proper time to dwell on the past.  sa ngayon ay nagsisimula pa lang akong harapin ang aking kinabukasan, binubuo ang aking plano, isa rito ang pagbabahagi ng mga pangyayari sa buhay ko sa pamamagitan ng diary na ito. 

    bago ko pa man isulat ang mga sensitibong entry sa blog na ito, inaasahan ko na may mga babatikos dito, bakit ko pa rin sinulat samantalanag pwede ko namang icensor ang mga ito?  maging mga komento ay inaaprub ko tulad ng mga komento mo, ito ay dahil pawang mga makatotohanang pangyayari lamang ang gusto kong isulat dito, mga bagay na tunay na nangyayari sa akin buhay.  mga bagay na sinisigurado kong pinagdaaanan rin ng iba.  kung sino man ang hindi kayang sikmurain ito ay may choice na patuloy na magbasa o hindi.  may karapatan din kayong maglagay ng inyong opinyon. sana lang ay iwasan natin ang maging prejudice sa ating mga bibitawang salita. unang una ay hindi mo alam ang pagkatao ko at hindi mo ako kilala para husgahan kung karapat dapat ba akong magka HIV, my level of promiscuity has yet to be revealed and the circumstances surrounding my acquiring the infection may never be fully understood. 

    maganda ang mga argumento mo, at isang balidong concern na nagmumula sa isang hiv negative na tao na hindi promiscuous (sadyang kabaligtaran at hindi katulad ng marami sa amin na mga HIV positive). natural magagalit ka. nirerespeto ko yan, yan ang values mo, maganda ang values mo, ipagpatuloy mo yan.  marahil ay nabasa mo na rin dun sa post ko ang mga rason ko kung bakit nangyari ang mga iyon, sana ay irespeto mo ito, hindi ko na inaasahan na maintindihan mo ito dahil mahirap maintindihan ang isang bagay kung hindi mo naman personal na pinagdadaanan, kailanman ay hindi mo maiintidihan ang mga dilemma na pinagdadaanan ko (namin) unless mapunta ka sa lugar namin.  hindi mo pwedeng ipush ang values mo sa values ko, magkaiba tayong tao.

    salamat sa pagsubaybay. sana ay natutunan ka sa blog ko.

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  5. Bong - don't worry about life!... dont feel discourage.. nangyare na ang dapat mangyare.. find strength in people close to you.. they will really help... and dont let anybody or anyone bring you down. Some people are still ignorant. I was ignorant too, till i got it.. Now i know more, its not yet too late for me or for us. I say, isa lang lang patutunguhan natin in the end.. pero di naman mahalaga kung kelan tayo mamaalam dito sa mundo.. ang importante is kung paano natin gugulin ang natitira nating buhay! :) continue to dream Bong and always be happy .. :)

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  6. nlv - ganun ka ba katanga para malaman na magkaiba ang lifestyle namin? kahit hindi ko sya kilala personallu, that doesn't exclude the fact na malinaw na magkaiba kami ng lifestyle.. basahin mo mga post nya ng malaman mo.. wag maging atrebida kung wala namng basis ang pinagsasabi mo.

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  7. Bong, haay.. bong, i just hope you'll be okay.. hindi ako nagcomment para awayin ka. Gusto ko lang na iremind ka about the risk of infecting other people kung patuloy mo pa ding gagawin ang mga nakasanayan mong casual sex with anyone else. May buhay pa sila, mga pangarap na gustong tuparin. So please, value their lives more than your urge for sex. Kung hindi mo kayang gawin, then try harder not to give in to your sexual urges. Kung may gusto makipagsex sayo, let them know about your status -kung gusto nilang gawin it with you despite all, then be it - atleast alam nila kung saan at kung ano ang maaring kalabasan ng mga gagawin nila. Alam kong mahirap ang pinagdadaanan mo, and honestly, kung may pagkakataon man na makatulong sayo sa kahit maliit na paraan, ill do it. Pero hindi ba't ang purpose ng blog na ito ay para magbigay babala sa mga tulad nating nabibilang sa LGBT community? Ang ginawa mong pakikipagtalik ng hindi mo pinapaalam dun sa nakasex mo ay salungat sa purpose ng blog na ito. Sana nauunawaan mo ang mga sinasabi ko. Huwag na sanang madagdagan pa yung mga taong masasaktan, luluha at matatakot para sa kanilang buhay, kinabukasan at pamilya nang dahil sa HIV.

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  8. nlv - hindi ako nagbigay ng opinyon para libakin ang kaibigan mo. I gave my opinion para matauhan sya na mali ang ginawa nya base sa last post nya.. i dont think i should answer any of your comment - sarado ang utak mo..take care nlv.

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  9. hindi ko siya kaibigan.

    i dont know even know him

    im just a fair and unbiased.

    .

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  10. Para fair. Inform your partner kasi it's not right. Lying is the same as not telling at all.everybody deserves to make informed decisions about their bodies. Respect works two ways. Just my two cents kuya bong.

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  11. for PLWHA (people living with HIV/AIDS), disclosure is a very tricky matter, with the stigma and the discrimination that is prevalent in the society today, you cannot expect us to just disclose our status that easily, as it can lead to a potential disaster in our life. no one can guarantee us safety and non-discrimination, and because of that, we will disclose our status only to people we trust.

    inuulit ko, ito ang aking diary, isusulat ko ang katotohanan sa buhay ko, negatibo o positibbo man ang mga mababasa ninyo, ito ay pawang katotohanan lamang, buhay ko ito, alamnauunawaan ko ang aking responsibilidad.

    BONG

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  12. While all of us acknowledge that as a person living with HIV, you are offered full protection of your human rights and civil liberties (as mandated by Republic Act 8504), your decision to have sex without disclosing your HIV-positive status to your sexual partner clearly constitutes irresponsible behavior. The argument that you “know it's safe sex” does not justify your deception of your sexual partner.

    Please consider the following reasons why the non-disclosure of your status was deemed irresponsible:

    (1) Just as individuals do not have the authority to physically harm one another, people are also denied the authority to injure others through sexual acts, such as from the transmission of a sexually transmitted disease. Even if, say, you are currently undergoing treatment and using protection during sex, it is important for all HIV-infected individuals to consider their ethical obligation to let others know of their possible exposure to HIV. Your decision not to disclose your HIV status to your sexual partner had put him at risk of getting exposed to a potentially life-threatening and presently incurable disease. In the event your partner becomes infected with HIV, in addition to facing a possible criminal charge, you may also be held financially liable since civil lawsuits may be filed to recover damages.

    (2) While condoms are deemed generally highly effective in reducing HIV transmission, condom use is still not 100% safe. In fact, studies by WHO and CDC suggest that “condoms are at least 80%, and possibly more, effective” in reducing HIV transmission. There is still, at most, a 20% chance that your unsuspecting partner becomes exposed to HIV. By letting your partner know about your status, he would have at least been given the chance to make an informed choice whether that 20% chance of getting exposed to HIV is worth the risk.

    (3) The fact that you decided to engage in sex 5 days after your diagnosis (even if you said you were safe), without awaiting the results of your HIV confirmatory test, without knowing your viral load, and without having started your anti-retroviral drug therapy, is reckless and negligent. Yes, we do all have needs. But you should have at the very least, exercised self-control. What if the results will turn out that you have a high viral load (therefore, highly infectious)?

    It would have been more prudent of you had you waited for your final results and received early treatment (if deemed necessary by your doctor) before deciding to become sexually active again. Remember, it is not only your health that is on the line right now. You are also responsible for actions that could potentially expose your previous, present or future sexual partners to HIV.

    In addition to condom use, anti-retroviral therapy could have been an important prevention strategy because it reduces viral burden, thereby reducing the risk of HIV transmission to sexual partners. (Please note that even an undetectable plasma viral load does not completely eliminate the risk of HIV infection.)

    * * * * *

    The bottomline is that we are not discriminating against or condemning you as a PERSON. Much of the concern arises from the fact we felt that your ACTION was deceptive, irresponsible and potentially harmful to others. And we hope that you understand why we were alarmed and reacted as such.

    Bong, we appreciate your honesty and determination to have a positive outlook. We all understand that you are going through a tough stage in your life. It is our sincerest hope that you find peace amidst all your struggles and that you continue to seek guidance and inspiration from your support groups.

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  13. to all: ikaw ba nagpatest ka na? lahat ba ng nakakasex mo tinatanong mo kung HIV positive? Lahat ba ng nakakasex mo tinatanong ka if HIV positive ka. lahat ba ng mga bakla ngayon, alam kung HIV positive sila or hindi?

    the issue of disclosure is a big issue. but i think the bigger issue is if lahat ba nagpapatest at least every 6 months.

    di ako nagmamalinis. i am HIV positive as well. i already informed my former sex partners that they need to undergo testing. i have a partner, and he is HIV positive as well. pero syempre, di kami pareho ni bong, he just started his journey.

    hi bong. just take it easy. medyo malaki lang ang "guilt factor" sa iyo kasi alam mong positive ka and di ka nagdisclose sa mga nakakasex mo. pero if you turn tables to your sex partners, sila ba nagdidisclose?

    for all we know, yung iba dyan, baka HIV positive na din, di nga lang nagpapatest kasi feeling nila safe sila.

    ang hirap kasi, dahil alam ng mga taong may HIV tayo, feeling nila ang linis linis na nila.

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  14. ralphong - thank you, i think ur comments are fair and unbiased...

    trese - welcome to my blog, hanap mo naman ako ng date, hehe

    thanks all! am feeling okay, medyo busy lang these past few days, i will update this blog soon...

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  15. Trese, i dont think you get the point.. anyway, be responsible enough for all your acts..

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  16. kahit di mo tanggapin bong, here's my two-cents on this...

    love yourself first. before u indulge in meaningless sex, why not look at the bigger picture. find someone who can love u, and stay with u for good -- may that person be positive or not.

    u deserve to be loved, and u deserve to find happiness. find it in the right places, from the right people. nanjan lang sha sa tabi-tabi. but if u give in to your sexual urges ng ganun kabilis, baka sa fleeting glory at ecstasy na naramdaman mo, eh di mo namalayan, nakalagpas na pala si 'forever'...

    be safe, be happy. life is still beautiful.

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  17. to jakejacobss: kahit gano ka pa kaingat mahahawaan ka parin ng "right guy" mo... nagpatest ka na ba? LOL!

    to ralphong: idemanda mo kaya lahat ng HIV+ pwede ikaw na rin tumayong abogado LOL!

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  18. what do they mean by 'needle prick'? nagkaroon ba ng ganyang eksena can someone tell me anu nangyari dun?

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