SISTER LOVE

MARCH 19, 2014, Wednesday, 11:20pm

HER: Kuya ***** told me about your condition :(( bakit naman 2 years na pala d ka nagsasabi sa amin, pano pala kung too late na? Kuya naman lagi ka wala sinasabi... Oo madami ka friends to help and support you pero kami naman family mo dapat alam namin nangyayari sayo sobrang lalayo na nga namin at hindi na tayo nagkikita. You have to give us a chance to help you in anyway we can. Sabi naman ng Kuya ***** you're doing everything and getting the best treatment. Doble ingats na dapat at alagaan mabuti sarili mo. You should tell Ate **** too. We are here for you no matter what and if you need anything I am just a msg away too.

ME: Hehe

HER: Anong hehe? Ikaw!!! I had to cry it out last night pa bago ako magising this morning para hindi masyado emo tas "hehe" sagot mo?? Baliw!

ME: http://www.parteeandplay.blogspot.com/2011/07/day-0-june-30-2011.html?m=0 - Yan ang first entry sa blog ko. Thats my story.

HER: I started reading it last night pa. kuya ***** told me about the blog too. Hayss.

ME: Am okay naman. Its not a very big deal really. Ayaw ko lang marami nagwoworry sa akin. Hahaha.

HER: Were suppose to worry and try to help you in anyway. Iuupdate mo kami kung ano nangyayari sa mga treatment mo. Kahit kay kuya **** alam mo naman ako kalahati lang utak minsan hindi ko naiintindihan. Pero alam ko serious yan kaya mag ingat ka.

ME: Thanks. Wag na muna ke ate **** Kayo na lang muna. At pls wag ng sabihin sa iba oks?

HER: Ikaw bahala. I wont say a thing. Let me know if you need anything at isasanla ko kaluluwa ko dyan sa tabitabi. Nasan kaba nasa province parin?

ME: Manila ako now, me tinatapos na trabaho. Punta ako sa province sa sabado.

HER: Yung pakiramdam mo ba ano? May sumasakit ba sayo? O normal lang?

ME: Wala normal lang naman. Alam na ni ***** (husband)? Anung sabi?

HER: Alam nya kase kaharap sya. This morning sabi nya sakin if you need help we'll be here to support and help. Actually ayaw pa sabihin ni Kuya **** we have to sit daw to talk about something another day.

ME: Tapos?

HER: E hindi ako makali i think i ask if its about you tas sabi ko is he sick? Hindi na sya sumagot

ME: Eh pano mo naman naisip na its abt me and that am sick? Do i look sick?

HER: Tas kase sabi ko for some reason everytime nakikita ko post mo sa fb about how you support those with it active ka Dun sa group to prevent it. Paramg naffeel ko lang baka meron ka rin nga matagal ko na naiisip actually. Pero syempre hula hula i dunno gawa lang nung pinopost mo sa fb

ME: Oks.

HER: Kaya yung naconfirm ko sa kanya yung feeling ko yung kinakatakutan ko na na feel ko palang totoo pala.

ME: Ganun na nga. Oks lang yan. Its not like before naman na walang gamot. Now the meds are really good and kelangan lang maging healthy lifestyle and iwas stress.

HER: Yun nga daw importante basta magingat sa lahat. Binabasa ko nga blog mo kagabi super positive kaparin which is great and youre helping others din. Yakang yaka ikaw pa.

ME: Korek

HER: Aylabyu very very much! Ikaw ay ipagdadasal ko galingan mo. Nalulungkot ako na hindi ako makauwi para makita kayo. Hays. Balitaan mo kami palagi kung ano nangyayari sayo.

ME: Okay po. Thanks labyu too.

--- My yougest sister is the best. I miss her :(

BACKSTORY:

So ayun na nga, before leaving, my brother asked my permission to tell our youngest sister and her husband, my being positive. Somehow ayaw nyang nagiisa lang sya na nakakaalam sa family ko at kung anu man daw ang mangyari they are both in a position to help me out. I said yes. They are 2 of my siblings which i am most comfortable with. I love them dearly. Nakakaluwag lang ng damdamin na malaman na kahit anung mangyari they will be there to help me, without judgement.

Am fine as of the moment. In a weeks time is my routine labs, 7mo after starting meds. Crucial kasi i wld know if my stats are getting better so il know if the meds are working for me. Crucial din kasi from the results i would know kung magfufullblast na ba ako sa work at par pursue ng other opportunities sa ibang field of work. I feel great naman. Aside from some minor fungal and bacterial infections na naagapan namang gamutin, I dont feel anything different.

Wish me luck on my lab results.

 

ito ang aking diary

ako si BONG

 

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WORKING OUT - SOY MILK vs ARVs!

my friend who i brought to testing who turned out positive recently started his ARVs and wrote a letter to www.thebody.com regarding his concerns with whey supplements and working out. i thought this is a good letter to share since marami akong kilala na nagwowork out.

ito ang aking diary

ako si BONG

SOY MILK vs ARVs

Jan 30, 2014

Hi, I have just started taking ARVs, less than 2 weeks and have somewhat adjusted. I do workout and started crossing out protein/gainer supplement intake for muscle building and take Soy Milk instead. Is that okay and if ever, can I just add a small scoop protein/gainer on my soy milk to help with muscle recovery? I have read with my meds to stay clear of creatinine and watch my triglyceride. My supplement does not contain creatine but has medium chain triglyceride. ARVs I'm taking Efavirenz, Lamivudine and Tenofovir. Please help.

Response from Mr. Vergel

I am not sure if you are a man or a woman.

If you are a man, I would say that I have strong biases against soy milk or any soy products. There are published references on how soy can increase estradiol. Estradiol is a female hormone that men need in small quantities for bone health, cognitive function and sex drive. It actually is made from the aromatization of testosterone in liver and fat cells. But too much estradiol can cause sexual dysfunction, decreased testosterone and possibly increased fat and cardiovascular risks. If you are lactose intolerant and need to drink something that tastes like milk, almond milk is best. But be careful not to drink the high sugar kind since high sugar consumption can increase triglycerides.

The effect of soy on estradiol concerns me even more in patients taking Efavirenz. There are at least 2 reports of HIV+ men who developed gynecomastia due to increased estradiol caused by Efavirenz. Luckily, this is rare in most men taking Efavirenz (Atripla or Sustiva).Efavirenz may cause gynecomastia

More on soy and muscle building/exercise here:Soy blunts the effects of testosterone after exercise

Whey protein supplements are OK and have been found not to interfere with HIV drug absorption or our hormones.

I am glad that you are being cautious about creatine supplements. Creatine is probably the only supplement that has been proven in several studies to increase body cell mass and strength, but it can load up the kidneys and may add to the kidney dysfunction that tenofovir can cause in a small subset of patients. Low doses under 10 grams per day (avd. 5 grams) have been safe on the kidneys, however.

I hope this helps! Feel free to ask me any related questions soon.

In health,

Nelson

 

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Self Empowerment Training - DONE!

16 new poz friends...

16 enlightening life stories disclosed...

16 more reasons to celebrate life...

with

a more open mind,

a more caring self,

a more loving heart,

and

a brighter and more productive future

ahead of us.

thanks to RITM and DOH!

i feel affirmed

i feel empowered

a great weekend

indeed!

 

ako si BONG

ito ang aking diary

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Si Nol - Spit or Swallow?

Bong,


hi I saw your email on the internet. Ako si NOL ofw sa Saudi arabia. gusto ko lang humingi ng payo regarding sa risk ko. recently may naka oral sex akong syrian dito. nalunok ko yung semen niya. ano ang chance ko na mag karoon ng HIV? Natatakot kasi akong magpatest kasi bawal ang bading dito sa saudi. balak ko sana sa pinas na ako mag pa test pag uwi ko. kaso by december pa uwi ko. I asked the opinion of AIDSMEDS kaso opinion nila wala daw risk ang oral sex. Totoo kaya yon? napaparanaoid na kasi ako. feeling ko mababaliw na ako kaka isp. hirap kasi dito walang anonymous testing center. Ano kayang risk if ever i delay ang testing? or malaki ba talaga ang chance na magkaroon ako ng HIV dahil sa oral sex? Please Ineed some advice thank you.


NOL

_____________________________________________




Hello Nol,


Yes its very low risk, you don't have to worry. Hiv virus will not survive sa stomach because of the gastric acids not unless you have lesions in your mouth or throat during swallowing. I think its okay for you to wait til december and get tested here in manila. 


Next time its always better to spit than to swallow.


Stay safe.


Bong

______________________________________________




Bong,


Thanks po. medyo lumuwag ang loob ko. kaso medyo kabado pa din ako kasi recently may LBM ako then may tumubong mouth sore sa bibig ko. medyo maliit lang pero kinakabahan ako. Hindi kaya symptoms ng HIV yon?


Nol




_______________________________________________




Nol,


Almost anything naman can be a symptom of hiv infection, dipende sa reaction ng katawan ng tao pa rin yan, madalas nga walang kahit anung signs ans symptoms. Taking HIV out of the picture, anybody can have LBM or mouthsore at kahit sabay sabay pa, doesnt necessarily mean meron ka.  There is no way to tell, Hiv test is the only way to know if indeed ur infected. 


Minsan lang medyo napaparanoid tayo. Just take the test the soonest possible time na alam mong safe ka. Don't worry too much. Minsan masama lang talaga ang weather at madalas tayo magkasakit.


Relaks ka lang, kung may makikita kang anonymous testing site dyan, much better para malaman mo na ang katotohanan.


Bong

I NEED HELP!

Hi Bong,

I read your blog today (all of your entries) and made me think of my own status.

Ive been very promiscuous and deep inside me alam ko 99.9% na meron na ako HIV.

First time kong sumulat sa isang blogger and lakas loob lang talaga. I am sure youre wondering nag pa test na ba ako? - hindi pa. Wala akong lakas ng loob para mag pa test. Natatakot ako, nakakahiya...

Kung ngayon pa lang na hindi pa confirmed status ko na discriminate na ako outside. Nasa mall ako with friends, may group of gay guys na naka tambay sa isang coffee shop kung san din kami ng friends ko pumunta. Pag dating naman dun ang rami kaagad parinig.
"gosh, he really looks sick"
"naku sana mawala na sya dito... " Etc...

Nung nakaupo na kami, mas maraming parinig, patama na alam naming lahat para sa akin. Minadali ko coffee ko at umalis kunyari tumawag ang bahay at importante.

Ngayon, sobrang takot ako lumabas, dinner with family and friends dahil sa nangyari na pwede ulet mangyari sa akin.

Nakita ko yung post mo sa hiv travel restrictions... Biglang pumasok sa isip ko eh kung lumabas ako g bansa at mag trabaho sa walang restrictions... Kaya lang, paano yung maiiwan ko dito? Paano yung pamilya ko?

Naisip ko din... Na para matahimik ako, sige mag papatest na ako. Pero saan? Saan walang tao mastado? Saan yung di ka mapapansin? Siguro by now, masasabi mong i really care what other people would think about me - at affected ako, may it be good or bad.

I read several blogs today and chose to write  you a letter, i dont know why. But i hope you can help.

Thanks.

PEDRO

______________________________

hello pedro,

ang pagsulat mo sa akin ay isang malaking step, salamat at naglakas loob ka.

unang una nais kong malaman mo na diskriminasyon ay talamak sa ating kultura.

madalas:
ang mga babae ay nadidiscriminate.
ang mga payat ay nadidiscriminate.
ang mga matataba ay nadidiscriminate.
ang mga mabababa ang height ay nadidiscriminate.
ang mga pangit ay nadidiscriminate.
ang mga bakla at lesbiyana ay nadidiscriminate.
at oo ang mga PLHIV ay nadidiscriminate din.
basta kakaiba, may potensyal na madiscriminate.

dapat nating tanggapin na andyan yan, kaya nga may mga adbokasiya
na lumalaban para ito ay wakasan, dahil hindi ito makatarungan.

ngunit sa ganang aki'y matagal pa o baka imposible pa sa ngayon na ito'y
mabura sa lipunang ating ginagalawan.

at dahil dito, dapat ay hindi dito magtatapos ang ating mundo, ang iyong mundo.
kung may nagdidiscriminate sa yo, tumayo ka at ipaglaban ang iyong sarili.
o maging matatag ka at wag mo silang pansinin.

ANG POINT KO IS - we cant please everyone, halos lahat ng tao may opinyon sa iba.

QUEBER NA! DONT CARE! TATANDA KA AGAD! PROMISE!
DONT RESTRICT YOUR LIFE. INSTEAD START ENJOYING IT.
LIVE IT.

pagmamahal sa sarili, unang una sa lahat.  ito ang pinaka importante. tanggapin ang sarili ng
walang pag  aalinlangan --- kapag tiwala at mahal mo ang iyong sarili,
walang sinumang tao ang makakasira sa iyo.

totoo ngang maraming taong negatibo,
sila ay dapat iwasan.

ngunit totoo ring mas maraming taong sadyang mababait at positibo ang pananaw sa buhay,
siguro sila ang kelangan mong hanapin at samahan.

unang una na rito ang iyong pamilya lalong lao na ang iyong mga magulang,
naniniwala akong sila ang magiging karamay mo sa hirap at ginhawa.
humugot ka sa kanila ng pagmamahal at lakas ng loob.

gayundin ang iyong tunay na mga kaibigan, magtiwala ka sa kanila.
sila ang unang unang makakaunawa sa iyo at nakikilala kang lubusan.

sa isyu naman ng HIV...
dapat tandaan na ang sobrang "promiscuity" per se ay hindi sapat para sabihin
na ikaw ay siguradong may HIV na.

maaaring promiscuous ang isang tao pero siya naman ay may sapat na kaalaman
at naprapraktis ng safe sex.

maaari ring minsan lang lumandi ang isang tao ngunit dahil naging pabayasiya,
ay buminggo na sya ng bonggang bonnga at confeeeermed na sya.

ang katotohanan - ang risk for HIV ay nakasalalay sa maraming bagay, isa na rito ang
"high-risk" sexual behavior tulad ng unprotected penetrative sex. at marami pang iba.

ang lahat ng ito ay matututunan mo kapag nagpa HIV testing ka.
sapagkat ayon sa panuntunan, kaalinsabay dapat ng HIV Testing ang
1. HIV 101, 2. Pre-Test Counseling, at 3. Post-Test Counseling.
ang prosesong ito ang nagsusulong na maipalaganap ang tama at bagong
impormasyon ukol sa HIV/AIDS at iba pang Sexually Transmitted Infection (STIs).
layunin ng prosesong ito na magkaroon ng 'behavioural change'  ang mga
taong daraan dito para makasiguradong maiwasan na ang paglaganap ng
HIV AIDS sa pilipinas (at least for those people who took the test).

kung lahat ng tao lang sana magpapatest. hayyyyy :(

datapwat subalit, hindi lahat ng HIV testing sites and private clinics ay
sumusunod sa ganitong proseso, lalong lalo na ang mga private testing
and diagnostic clinics (base sa aking mga panayam) - ito ang mga clinics
na hindi naman prayoridad at espesyalisasyon ang STI HIV AIDS.
kalimitan rin sa kanila ay may bayad.

para makasiguradong tama ang proseso at maasikaso ng mabuti ang iyong
pangangailangan hinggil sa HIV AIDS at STI, ang rekomendasyon ko ay pumunta
sa pinakamalapit na  SOCIAL HYGIENE CLINICs (libre dito) narito ang listahan
http://theloveyourselfproject.blogspot.com/p/hiv-test-sites.html

gayundin sa mga NGO and advocacy groups na nagbibigay ng mga special testing dates.
halimbawa :

1. ASP (Aids Society of the Philippines) --- FREE HIV Confidential (with Pre and Post) Counseling and Testing every 1st Friday (5pm - 9pm) and 3rd Saturday (10am - 3pm) of the month - 2/F OTM Bldg. No. 71 Scout Tuason Street - Bgy South Triangle, Quezon City - For more info please call 3762541

2. The Love Yourself Project  - nagsasagawa ng FREE testing every quarter (next one is on MARCH 4). http://loveyourself.ph/

narito ang aking blog entry about these groups:
http://parteeandplay.blogspot.com/2012/01/stakehoders-ngos-advocacy-groups.html

sa aking experience, mas kumportable ang pumunta sa mga social hygiene clinics at advocacy groups dahil ito ang kanilang forte (HIV AIDS STI)  gayundin ay sila rin amg mga aktibo sa pagsusulong mga mga anti-disrimination and stigma campaigns kaya sapat lamang na isa alang alang nila ang mga espesyal na pangangailangan at atensyon nga mga tulad natin na sensitibo rito.

kung gusto mo talaga konti lang tao i highly recommend,

Makati Social Hygiene Clinic (discreet tinted & unmarked room at 7th floor of Makati City Hall),
JP Rizal St. Brgy. :Poblacion, Makati City / 8701615
look for Yoyie or Ms. Tess (Nurse)

or

Mandaluyong Social Hygiene Clinic
Dr. Yolanda Tuaño - Social Hygiene Clinic Physician
Lerma corner Vicencio Sts., Old Zaniga, Mandaluyong City / 5467799; 2115336
Mobile #: 09178424298

or

RITM Satellite Clinic
#1850 Leon Guinto Street, Malate, Manila
Phone: (+63-927) 704-8646
Contact person: Lean
Clinic hours: Mondays thru Saturdays, 9 AM to 6 PM

kung kailangan mo ng further refferal or gusto mong may makasama
pwede pa rin kitang matulungan, just ask.

bothered lang ako sa claims mo na 99.9% alam mong positive ka.
at nadiscriminate ka ---
do you look sickly?
did you lose a lot of weight?
are there any visible signs & symptoms?

and even if you answered YES on all my questions above, hindi pa rin ibig sabihin na may HIV ka na, dahil marami pang ibang sakit na maaaring iyon din ang sintomas.

HIV test lang ang tanging paraan para malaman mo kaya go ka na bilis.

ukol din sa option mo nag mangibang bansa sa mga bansang walang restrictions, malaking konsiderasyon din na dapat mong isipin na kung HIV Positive ka, libre ang gamot sa pilipinas para sa mga pilipino - pag  nangibang bansa ka, maaring hindi libre ang gamot para sa mga dayuhan at ngayon pa lang ay sinasabi ko ng may kamahalan ang mga ARVs (anti-retroviral drugs) kaya dapat mo itong pag isipan.

unang step. magpatest ka. kung kailangan mo nga makakasama, magregister ka dito:
http://theloveyourselfproject.blogspot.com/p/i-want-to-get-tested.html

salamat at ako napili mong sulatan. touched ako promise ;)

okay sya keep me posted kung anu ng nangyari sa yo.

hiling ko na maging maligaya ka.


BONG


(PS:  hiv is a matter of life and death, the key is early detection, for once you should stop thinking about other people and put yourself on top priority, isa lang ang buhay natin - huwag sayangin dahil lamang sa hiya or sa takot sa sasabihin ng iba)

AT YOUR SERVICE

call me

but text me first

i can talk when im not busy

follow me on twitter

ask me quick questions

i will answer when i can

ask me anything about my status 

lets talk about hiv/aids

lets talk about your fears

lets talk about your status

lets be friends

lets be safe

lets help

you

&

me

this is my special project in celebration of my very healthy 3rd monthsary

i am so blessed with an amazing support group

because of them i would like to give support to others too 

in any way i can

thank you